I'm still reading my devotional that I love so very much (The Excellent Wife). I just finished reading the section on respecting your husband. Once again, this topic is something that many people today would get offended by or get really defensive over. Showing respect to your husband, especially when you don't feel like they deserve it, goes against every thing feminist believe and fight for. But, it's what God commands of us. I was really convicted. Overall, I think I do an ok job at respecting J. I'm by no means perfect, but I try not to talk down to him in public and I try to lift him up and encourage him. There are many times, though, that I get angry and don't think he deserves my respect for certain things. There are times when I feel like he's making a bad choice or like he should do something for me or treat me (or the boys) a certain way. Please do not read this wrong. My husband is amazing. Seriously amazing. He is so good to my boys and me and there is never a doubt that he loves us. He's still human. He still makes mistakes. As my mom would say, he's a great guy, but he's not perfect (hi mom:)). Those are the times when I have a hard time showing him respect. When I feel like he's being selfish, I give dirty looks, raise my voice, say things I shouldn't say. I am very disrespectful. If you were to point it out to me at that moment, I would probably say something along the lines of, "Well I don't think he deserves my respect right now!" And you know, that may be true. The book even says there may be times when your husband doesn't deserve your respect. HOWEVER, the Bible does not tell us to respect our husbands only when we deserve it. It says to respect your husband. Period. There are no exceptions. We should show respect to him all the time. That does not mean that we have to let him get away with treating us badly. In fact, there is also a section that talks about rebuking your husband... respectfully. When I need to tell my husband that he's making the wrong choice or that he has a bad attitude, I need to do it in a loving way, to uplift him and help him to change his way to honor God. I shouldn't be mean or anything like that. I shouldn't act like I'm perfect and know everything.
I finished that section last week. On Sunday, I saw an example of a wife who showed disrespect to her husband. Out in public, at church even. It made me sad to see her treat her husband that way, and the look on his face broke my heart. How sad that even Christians act that way toward their spouse... in God's house! As wives, we need to pray that God will help us to be kind, patient, and loving toward our husbands. When they deserve it, and when they don't. We have a responsibility to obey God regardless of the circumstances.
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